What Millennials Really REALLY Mean

The other day I came across an article on a business website entitled: 'What Millennials Really Mean'. It was a post I imagine would be thoroughly analysed by the non Millennials in an office - in an attempt to decode their younger workers and hopefully make their workplace more efficient.

However, the five sayings and their interpretations in this article were so obviously written by a non Millennial it was almost funny. By almost I mean it definitely was - and as I shared it with my Millennial colleagues we laughed and cringed at the entire concept of the post and the way we were construed.

Though I do get it.

Sometimes it may seem like us Millennials are speaking a different language - but it's probably not the one you think. So here are some actual terms you might hear us saying, both in the workplace and out in the real world. If you are a Millennial and have anything to add or amend to this list, let me know. And if you're not a Millennial... you're welcome.

Now the introduction to this post is over, as a general rule we will NEVER refer to ourselves as this. If we do, question us and tell us to get a grip

This can mean one of two things:
1. I want you to understand that I really mean what I am saying, but as I have already used three exclamation marks in this email, I need to try and keep it somewhat professional (works both sincerely and sarcastically)
2. I might be smiling but on the other side of this email/Whatsapp I am about ready to punch you in the face

Yeah I think I saw that on your Instagram/Facebook/Snapchat
Of course I saw that on all of your social media channels at least seventy times. Please refrain from spamming me with your fabulous life before I consider blocking you on everything - if worst comes to worst - including LinkedIn

I'm 100% not laughing. If used on it's own we most likely want you to stop talking to us

I should be able to do the *insert work thing here*, when can I let you know?
We have grown up in a time where being keen is very uncool, and so playing it cool comes as second nature. YES I am interested in a work bake off, but I don't want to be the first to admit how interested. I need to wait for at least four other people to officially sign up before I can declare my love for Mary Berry

More than one 'o' indicates I may have actually had a little chuckle at whatever you are saying. But to be honest, unless we explicitly tell you we have laughed out loud, we probably haven't

I miss uni/home/college/school
If you overhear one of us reminiscing like this, we are in a fragile state. We really didn't know what we had until we grew up and had bills to pay. Just have some compassion and let us wallow and talk about student discount and home cooked meals until we are at least 27 okay.

I'm not sure if I am free, I will have to check
Of course I am free, but I actually have a life to get on with. And by life I often mean a Netflix series to binge on. Please come back to us when we have a more valid reason for being antisocial.

Sorry I missed your call I was busy (in the office)
I have missed your call accidentally and genuinely was busy. But for some reason everyone seems to think that all we do is browse Buzzfeed..

Sorry I missed your call I was busy (out of the office)
Sometimes we do miss your calls accidentally and genuinely were busy. Other times we can see you are calling us but screen you on purpose - because re-scrolling to your exact place in a group chat you are trying to catch up on is a nightmare. It's honestly nothing personal Mum jeez.

And there you have it.

Essentially (and shockingly) we speak the same language as the other generations, but sometimes our words are laden with a little more sarcasm.

~Sorry not sorry~

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